15 Bad Table Manners You Must Avoid
Let’s face it, bad table manners can be very bothersome to the point it can affect the entire dining experience. We all want to have a pleasant time eating our meals with our family and friends, so it is important to be mindful and pay attention to this list so that we can take notes of what to avoid when dining out.
Table of Contents
Toggle15 Bad Table Manners, Avoid Them!
1. Double-Dipping
The infamous act of dipping a morsel, taking a bite, and then dipping again is nothing short of a communal crime. Please refrain from doing this when you’re sharing a dish with your table. This habit not only spreads germs but also showcases a disregard for others.
2. Hogging the Best Parts
Whether it’s picking out all the shrimp from a dish or devouring the crispy skin off a roast, taking the best part of a communal dish without considering others is a clear breach of dining decorum. Be mindful of others– if you’ve taken the best or biggest portion of one dish, give others a turn for the next.
3. Chewing with Your Mouth Open
This is a classic violation of table manners. The sight and sound of someone masticating with their mouth open is not only off-putting but also disrupts the dining ambiance. Pay attention to your mouth when you’re eating please, nothing is worse than when some of the bits came out and spatter the people next and across you.
4. Touching All the Food
Imagine watching someone handle every piece of dessert on a shared platter, as if they were inspecting each one. Not only that this is unsanitary, it is also inconsiderate, ruining the presentation of the dish can leave others with no appetite for what remains.
5. Using Your Phone at the Table
In the age of digital distraction, nothing is more disruptive than a ringing phone at the dinner table. Answering calls or texting during a meal is not only rude but also detracts from the social experience. Enjoy and be present!
6. Blowing Your Nose at the Table
This one is just downright, unacceptable. Clearing your sinuses while others are enjoying their meal is a sign of disrespect. If the need arises, excuse yourself to the restroom—no one wants to hear or see this while dining.
7. Being Rude to the Server
Treating others like how you want to be treated and treating servers with anything less than respect is a grave mistake. They are there to enhance your dining experience, not to be at your beck and call. Politeness and patience are the hallmarks of a true diner.
8. Reaching Across the Table
Stretching across the table to grab an item, rather than asking for it to be passed, disrupts the dining flow and invades others’ personal space. Especially it risks for you to knock the dishes and glasses, turning a pleasant time to a bad experience if some wine is spilled and stain other people’s clothes.
9. Talking with Your Mouth Full
Engaging in conversation with a full mouth is not only unappealing but also hinders clear communication. Always finish chewing before you speak.
10. Fidgeting at the Table
Constantly adjusting your tie, playing with your jewelry, or fiddling with your utensils can be distracting. Sit calmly and focus on the meal and company. If you need a moment to respite, seek sanctuary in the restroom for a moment and return once you’re calm and comfortable.
11. Toothpick Etiquette
Using a toothpick after a meal is fine — but how you do it matters. Picking your teeth openly at the table is considered impolite and unappealing. If you need to use a toothpick, cover your mouth with your hand or excuse yourself to the restroom. Never dig into your teeth while talking to others or leaning over your plate. It’s a small gesture, but it keeps the atmosphere pleasant and respectful for everyone.
12. Personal Grooming at the Table
The dining table is not the place to fix your hair, reapply lipstick, or check your teeth in a mirror. Even small grooming actions like scratching your scalp, filing your nails, or adjusting your makeup can make others uncomfortable — and it’s unhygienic, too. If you need to freshen up, step away to the restroom. Good manners mean keeping the focus on the meal and conversation, not on personal touch-ups.
13. Handling Your Napkin
Your napkin isn’t just decoration — it’s part of proper dining etiquette. As soon as you sit down, place the napkin on your lap (never tuck it into your collar). Use it gently to dab your mouth when needed, not to wipe or scrub.
If you need to leave the table temporarily, place the napkin on your chair to signal you’ll be back. When the meal is over, fold it loosely and set it to the left of your plate. Never crumple it or leave it on the table as if you’re done with a paper tissue — that’s a big etiquette mistake!
14. Starting to Eat Before Everyone Else / Before the Host
No matter how good the food smells, resist the temptation to start eating before everyone else — especially before the host or the elder at the table begins. This shows respect and patience. Dining is a shared experience, and starting too early can appear selfish or impatient.
Wait until everyone has been served and the host gives a signal (often by starting to eat themselves) before you take your first bite. It’s a simple gesture that reflects courtesy and good upbringing.
15. Taking Excessive Portions of Shared Dishes
When dining with others always be mindful of portion size. Taking too much food before others have had a chance to serve themselves is seen as greedy and inconsiderate. Start with a moderate portion and only go for seconds if there’s enough left for everyone.
Remember, good manners mean sharing generously, not hoarding the best parts of the dish. It’s always better to leave a little extra for others than to pile your plate too high.
Related article: How to Use Cutlery Properly at Restaurant
Dining Etiquette Across Different Meal Settings
Dining etiquette isn’t one-size-fits-all. It changes depending on the setting, purpose of the meal, and cultural background. In formal dining situations such as business events or official dinners, table manners tend to be more structured.
Utensils are usually used from the outside in, following the order of the courses served. Good posture matters, eating quietly is expected, and conversations should stay polite and appropriate. These small details help create a professional and respectful atmosphere.
On the other hand, informal dining—like meals with family or close friends—feels much more relaxed. While basic politeness is still important, you don’t need to stress over strict utensil rules or perfect posture. The focus is more on enjoying the food and the company. That said, being mindful still shows good manners.
Cultural differences also play a big role in dining etiquette. In many Western cultures, forks and knives are commonly used for most foods, while in many Asian cultures, spoons and chopsticks are the norm. Understanding these differences helps avoid awkward moments and shows respect for local customs.
During business dinners, it’s best to keep conversations professional and respect time constraints, while family gatherings allow you to be more casual. Just remember to value the shared meal and avoid sensitive topics. In any setting, good etiquette is really about respect, awareness, and making everyone feel comfortable at the table
Beyond the Basics: Etiquette for the Experienced Diner
For those accustomed to fine dining, the list above represents the foundation. The following courtesies operate at a level above it — and are where the truly polished guest distinguishes themselves.
Engaging with the Sommelier
Your sommelier is a guide, not an order-taker. Rather than simply pointing to a bottle, take a moment to share your preferences and the dishes you have ordered. Allow them to present the bottle, confirm the label, and offer a taste before you accept. A measured nod of approval is sufficient. This brief exchange is not merely about selecting wine — it is an appreciation of the expertise that elevates your meal.
Discreetly Managing Dietary Requirements
If you have dietary restrictions or preferences, communicate them at the time of reservation rather than at the table. This allows the kitchen to prepare accordingly without disrupting the flow of service. If something must be raised at the table, do so quietly with your server at the start of the meal, not mid-course. Discretion in this regard reflects consideration for both the kitchen and your fellow diners.
The Art of Conversation at the Fine Dining Table
In fine dining, conversation is as much a part of the experience as the food. It should be engaging and inclusive, kept at a volume that complements the ambiance rather than dominating it. Avoid sensitive or divisive topics. The goal is to enrich the shared experience, allowing space for quiet appreciation of the cuisine and company, rather than filling every moment with chatter.
Cultural Finesse: Etiquette in Jakarta’s Fine Dining Scene
While international fine dining standards provide a universal framework, Jakarta’s cosmopolitan dining culture layers local sensibilities on top of them. For guests at Lawry’s, an awareness of both dimensions makes for a more genuinely refined presence at the table.
Blending Traditions: Respect in a Cosmopolitan Setting
In Jakarta, where global culinary excellence meets rich Indonesian heritage, small cultural acknowledgments elevate your dining presence. While Western cutlery protocols are standard at Lawry’s, a genuine ‘terima kasih’ to the staff, respectful eye contact, and an attentive demeanour toward those serving you demonstrate a cultivated awareness that goes beyond knowing which fork to use.
Private Dining and Business Gatherings
For business dinners and private functions — common among Jakarta’s senior professionals — the emphasis shifts toward discretion and professional decorum. Punctuality signals respect for the host. Sensitive matters are best introduced once the meal has progressed and rapport is established. Allow the host to set the tone and pace, and let the setting do some of the work of building the relationship.
Good table manners, at their core, are about making the people around you feel comfortable. At Lawry’s The Prime Rib Jakarta, that instinct is built into everything we do, from the way our team serves to the way the dining room is designed. If you are ready to experience a meal where every detail has been considered, we would be glad to have you. Reserve your table!
FAQ
Double-dipping spreads germs and shows a lack of consideration for others, especially when sharing food.
Be mindful and share—if you've taken the best part, offer others the same opportunity for the next round.
No, using your phone at the table distracts from the dining experience and is considered rude. Stay present and enjoy the moment!
Table manners for kids are simple habits that teach them how to eat politely and respectfully at the table. This includes washing hands before meals, sitting properly on the chair, using utensils correctly, chewing with their mouth closed, and saying “please” and “thank you.” Kids are also encouraged to wait until everyone is served before starting and to ask politely if they need something.
I am Chef Camille, Executive Chef at Lawry’s Jakarta, bringing 30 years of expertise from Michelin-starred kitchens in France and our Beverly Hills original to your table. I am dedicated to preserving the iconic flavors and service standards that have defined Lawry’s since 1938. I personally review every article published here to ensure our content remains true to our mission of culinary excellence.
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